Has Communication Become the Achilles Heel of Organisations?

The second of the only two man-made spacecrafts to enter interstellar space, Voyager 2 was a brave move by the National Aeronautics & Space Administration [NASA]. Launched in the 1970s at a cost of 895 billion dollars, this was a lengthy and costly venture. Destined to study the edge of our solar system, this craft was 12 billion miles from earth when in July 2023 disaster struck. Forty-six years into this groundbreaking mission, the whole endeavour was in jeopardy. With a spaceship lost in space, NASA was forced to go public with their problem. In a somewhat feeble attempt to explain the challenge they faced, their problem was summed up in just two words – ‘Poor Communication’.

Whether involved with a company, charitable enterprise or church,

Christ-followers are on a mission to bring heaven to earth.

While our endeavours are commendable, there is one area in which we’re all vulnerable. No matter how praiseworthy our venture, we’re all potentially one poor communication away from losing touch with our mission.

With this in mind, let me suggest Seven Laws of Great Communication.

1. Make and Maintain the Connection

Although communication itself is a form of connection, great communicators know the importance of making and maintaining interpersonal connections. In his classic book, ‘Everyone Communicates, Few Connect’,John Maxwell writes, ‘Connecting is the ability to identify with people and relate to them in a way that increases your influence with them.’[1]

To treat people as individual cogs that keep the organisational wheels turning is deeply offensive. As Christian entrepreneurs, we have to value every employee, volunteer or church attendee as a gift from God. Although some individuals may not come ‘gift wrapped’ with the language and lifestyle we’d prefer, we should remember that we are all made in the image of God, but due to our waywardness, we are all flawed individuals. To view individuals as a means to an end is simply wrong. Such actions serve only to silence the melody of heaven amidst the mayhem of a secular approach to church, commerce and charitable enterprise. In that all communication is 60 per cent non-verbal, no listener wants to feel that a conversation is a mere tick-box exercise. Treating people as distant relatives with whom we occasionally engage in small talk at a family wedding or funeral will ultimately cause heaven’s mission to fail.

‘The ability to connect with others begins with

understanding the value of people.’[2]

Joe Girard was, for twelve consecutive, years listed in the Guinness Book of Records as ‘The World’s Greatest Salesman’. Not that this sales entrepreneur came from a privileged background. Joe was abused by his father as a child and lost jobs as an adult. Before landing a job at a Chevrolet dealership, he also experienced bankruptcy.[3] In selling more vehicles than any other dealership, Joe’s phenomenal success was the result of his relational, rather than retail approach to sales. More than profit or product, people mattered to this salesman-extraordinaire. Sending handwritten cards to each of his past or prospective customers, his monthly communications, were never about products or sales, but words of appreciation and encouragement. Over a period of fifteen years, he sent 13,000 handwritten cards. People actually began to look forward to their monthly correspondence. And when in the market for a new car, guess who was their number-one-go-to-salesman – Joe Girard.

To me, this practice of ‘relational marketing’ highlights the importance of Making and Maintaining the Connection. For only when we truly connect, can we truly communicate.

2. Listen to the Listeners

More time spent listening to the listeners will improve both

our connectivity and ultimately our communication.

When communication becomes a masterclass in missing the point, the problem often lies in our inability to listen to the listener. In this instance, we might learn something from a particular style of couples counselling in which the practitioners operate the practice of ‘Pass the Teddy Bear’. Only the person holding the teddy bear is allowed to speak. When one person has finished talking, the cuddly toy is handed to the listener. Only then do they have the opportunity to repeat what they have understood by the words spoken to them and state how they would wish to response. No matter how life-changing we believe our words to be, if the listener fails to understand, our communication will fall into a meaningless void of misunderstanding.

Communication is an art form developed over time. While words are couriers transporting our thoughts, those driving up a one-way-street of all talk and no listening will fail to reach their desired destination. Often, those with control issues might appear to be listening, but the truth is, they’re only waiting for a pause in the proceedings to enable them to download more of their own thoughts. Besides being disrespectful, one-sided communications devalue the listener and will ultimately sever the connection. Great communicators make listeners feel the most valued person in the room who leave feeling they have been heard.

‘The most effective communicators are great listeners. Often, we listen with the intent to reply, when we should really listen with the intent to understand.’

Stephen Covey[4]

3. Don’t Assume

Assumption is a killer of great communication.

Whether in marriage, ministry or management, making assumptions will ultimately destroy the purpose of a set piece of communication. We fool ourselves into believing that our words will automatically fall on good ground and produce the required affect. Words are couriers delivering what the mind is thinking – but no amount of proverbial ‘door knocking’ will gain entrance to an unreceptive listener.

Those adopting the ‘trickle-down theory’ that assumes telling one person is equivalent to telling all, should rethink their strategy. The childhood game of ‘Chinese whispers’ proves the point. Verbal osmosis rarely happens and when it does, it rarely repeats the content and intent of the original message. Few communications cascade down to a group of recipients with the same intensity and intentionality of the original spokesperson. Ignorance is not bliss. Great communicators need to do whatever they can to get their message safely home. Never assume that people have heard the heart of a matter.

While ‘feedback’ is ‘the breakfast of champions’, ‘follow-up’

is the staple diet of great communicators.

Remember, ‘Passing the Teddy Bear’ is a principle that all communicators must operate is some way.

4. Avoid Information Overload

In this information age, we need to accept people’s personal circumstances and capacity and communicate proportionately. Whether in the secular or spiritual sphere, information overload is a modern-day dilemma that needs careful monitoring.

With all forms of media bombarding us with information, we now have a word to describe our finite ability to process it – ‘Infobesity’. Great communicators understand that everyone has a limited capacity and they communicate their message accordingly.

Bite-sized pieces of information are better than information overload.

When the apostle Paul acknowledged to his readers that ‘There are ... many ... voices in the world, and none of them without significance,’[5] he was not only recognising the plethora of voices clambering for our attention, but encouraging people to analyse their significance. Listeners will automatically switch off when the message is not engaging them in a proactive way. In such instances the brain will tend to switch off.

5. Avoid giving ‘Too Little’ ‘Too Late’

In the realm of poor communication, ‘too much too soon’ is a close relative of ‘too little too late’. While acknowledging the clear and present danger of TMIs (Too Much Information), drip-feeding information can equally weaken an organisation. Although some individuals might prefer minimum detail, a little knowledge is dangerous thing. Adopting a last-minute.com approach to communication will inevitably cause cracks to appear in the motivational dynamic of any corporate enterprise.

When people are left precariously balanced between the unknown and

the unsure, they soon begin to feel uncared for.

6. Use Relevant Language

When an ex-public-school friend became a minister of a downtown church in Chicago, he found to his cost the failure to understand the sixth law of great communication. Having preached his Sunday morning sermon, he dismissed the congregations with the words, ‘Let’s go home and enjoy a Sunday joint.’

To an English gent, a classic Sunday lunch would consist of a roasted leg of lamb, often called a ‘joint’. In the right place at the right time, that term would be perfectly acceptable, but to a downtown, inner-city American congregation, the phrase had more risky connotations.

No matter how vital our message, knowing your audience is crucial. Knowing the age, cultural background, experience and expectations of those with whom we are seeking to communicate, is essential.

Using relevant language is the life blood of great communication.

7. Look for the Sparkle in their Eyes

Great communicators are more interested in the recipient, than themselves. Constantly looking at the listener, they are asking themselves one question, ‘Are my words enlivening those I’m speaking to or are they closing them down.’ Put another way, all communication should be ‘Making the Mummies Dance’ – which is the title of my book I recently published on preaching and teaching, available through www.spicersink.com.

Great communicators adjust their terminology, timing and tempo to suit both the message and the audience. They speak with clarity, knowing that being vague will vandalise the truth. Great communicators never want their listeners to be left in the no-mans-land of confusion, misinformation or disinformation.

In Greek mythology, Achilles was a hero who fought in the Trojan wars. A central character in the writings of Homer, Achilles was seemingly invincible, that is, apart from his heel. Through a series of mythological events, he became vulnerable to defeat by reason of an unprotected heel – hence the phrase, ‘Achilles Heel’, being representative of personal vulnerability.

No matter how strong, successful and seemingly invincible an organisation looks, when it comes to communication, we are all vulnerable. Large and small corporations may boldly publish their successes, but a failure to communicate clearly and consistently will, over time, prove disastrous. From sales to customer service, all organisations rise and fall on their ability to communicate.

Whether leading a church, company or charitable enterprise, we each have to ask ourselves the question: ‘Has Communication Become the Achilles Heel?’

[1] Everyone Communicates, Few Connect,’ John Maxwell, Thomas Nelson, 2010, [2] Ibid, p.15 [3] Joe Girard: The Car Salesman & Relationship Marketing To Grow Your Business!, Ian Kingswell, Relationship Developer at Promptings, 17 January, 2015, https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/joe-girard-car-salesman-relationship-marketing-grow-your-ian-kingwill/?articleId=8948216185013465731 [4] https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2020/02/04/the-sixth-commandment-of-highly-effective-leadership-be-an-effective-listener/ 4 February 2020 – The Sixth Commandment of Highly Effective Leadership: Be an Effective Listener. [5] 1 Corinthians 14:10, KJV.

Is Ageism Alive and Well in the Church?

Baby Boomers[i] Breaking through the Age Barrier

The traditional view of all sixty-five-year-olds stepping blissfully into retirement, is rapidly being dispatched to the history books. While some retirees are happy to slip quietly into their autumn years, others are taking the words of Dylan Thomas more literally, when he writes, ‘Do not go gently into that long good night.’ [ii] Refusing to accept the stereotypical view of old-age, these mature warriors are marching to a different drumbeat. As Christian combatants they are seeking to join the ranks of a multigenerational church. Having no desire to belong to an age bubble these radical retirees find themselves subconsciously repeating the Psalmist’s plea, ‘don’t turn me out to pasture when I’m old or put me on the shelf when I can’t pull my weight.’ [iii]

With an ageing population, communities, including the church, are having to rethink an age-old-problem.

It seems that while advocating there is no retirement in God’s Kingdom, some go-getting geriatrics are being made to feel redundant by short-sighted, one-dimensional, leaders. In the light of this one has to wonder if: ‘Ageism is alive and well in the church? This narrow-minded behaviour of a few will not only bring the Christian church into disrepute, but over time cast doubt on its future.

Some historians would have us believe that ‘the elderly were revered, active citizens of ancient Rome. But on closer inspection, it appears that older people may not have enjoyed a respected or as powerful a place in Roman society as has been supposed.’[iv] Tom Parkin, author of ‘Old age in the Roman World’ has detected a general lack of interest in the treatment of older people in the Roman world, he notes that ‘privileges granted the aged generally took the form of exemptions from duties [rather] than [any] positive benefit.’ Parkin goes on to argue that ‘the elderly were granted no privileged status or ongoing social roles. At the same time, they were both permitted - and expected – to continue to participate actively in society for as long as they were able.’[v]It is this empire building rather than kingdom thinking that church leaders should be aware of.

While the Chinese legislate concerning parental care, the Koreans celebrate old age without the need of legislation. Like their Japanese and Chinese counterparts, the Koreans accept and respect their elders as a vital part on a vibrant society. Mediterranean and Latin cultures go further in building a multigenerational community. The older generation assists in caring for the young, while the breadwinners work outside the home - all in the style of ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding.’ However, ‘Western cultures tend to-be more youth-centric, emphasizing attributes like individualism and independence.’ Linking this philosophy to a Protestant work ethic that ‘ties an individual’s value to his or her ability to work – something that diminishes in old age,’[vi]- some believe this to be the root of an age-old problem facing both the USA and UK.

Any culture that is youth-centric and values the elderly only

in terms of their ability to work, will surely fail.

Although often ignored, side-lined and put out to graze, elderly Christians continue to push for a place at the table of human kindness, a spiritual home in which they feel accepted, appreciated and approved. In an attempt to address the issue, some church leaders have created age bubbles in which the elderly can sing hymns, tell stories and reminisce about yesteryear to their hearts content. Sadly, such groups do little to engage the vast experience and expertise these elderly saints possess.

Creating a Caleb Culture

However, there is a biblical octogenarian, who goes by the name of Caleb, who offers us some valid advice concerning the question of ageism in a redeemed community.

As an ardent follower of the adage, ‘Age is an Attitude’ – I have come to realise that this saying is both one and multi-dimensional- it has both a personal and corporate application. For us to individually prosper we all need a corporate environment that fosters an angle of approach in life that enables us to fulfil our God-given dreams.

The eighty-year-old Caleb who refused to allow the wilderness years to affect his mountaineering mindset, needed a positive environment in which to foster his can-do-attitude.

As commendable as Caleb’s angle of approach to life was,[vii] it took a Joshua-styled leadership and a redemptive community, to create a positive environment in which his dream could be realised.

For present-day Caleb’s to survive the cruel realities of later life, they need a multi-generational community lead by a Joshua styled leadership that encourages them to pursue the purpose of God in all stages of life. However, when it comes to building this kind of culture it seems that maybe society is leading the way.

With the average life expectancy soaring, Western leaders are beginning to realise just how much older people have to offer in building a multigenerational community. In her article ‘Breaking the Age Barrier,’ Mary Jacob’s writes, ‘Even multigenerational setting - such as churches … tend to tailor their programming by age: a [exercise] class for seniors; a Bible Study for young adults; a science camp for kids. As a result, most of us have few opportunities to make friends with people outside our own age group.’ [viii]

Age segregation not only contributes to social isolation but also reinforces stereo-types and perpetuate ageism.

Eunice Lin Nichols, notes that ‘older people tend to stay healthier, both physically and cognitively, when they have strong social connections.’ And one senior citizen who refused to be generationally isolated, pragmatically praises his new multi-generational relationships by stating that, ‘while the young might give us the heads up on useful smartphone apps, we might be able to give the young some advice on relationships and careers.’ [ix]

In Boston they are pairing older houseowners with students who need housing. Using the spare bedrooms of empty nesters, the arrangement not only offers student accommodation, but creates multigenerational friendships. In another American city a retirement community is offering a handful of apartments at no cost to 20-somethings musical student in exchange for performing for the residents. In New York City a social services program connects 7,000 children, teens and young adults with 3,000 old adults. The idea is to enlists volunteers to serve as “friendly visitors” to isolated older adults. Hosting intergenerational chess games, art sessions and providing opportunities for older adults to read to children.

So, what if in an attempt to build multigenerational communities, local churches were to …

• Create multigenerational prayer groups whereby a group of senior citizens arrange regular Zoom meetings with young leaders so as to know how, in confidence, they can best to pray for them. This in turn would create multigenerational friendships that helps the elderly feel included, rather than isolated and novice leaders to feel valued.

• Institute a ‘Buddy System’ - just as non-swimmers are paired with a swimmer to coach them in the challenges of a new watery environment – young pastors are paired with a mature leader who believes the best for their new found proteges. This multigenerational pairing uses the expertise and experience of the one to stop the other drowning in an uncertain environment.

• Organise twice-yearly ‘Guess who’s Coming to Dinner’ events. People decide whether to be guests or hosts and in order to ‘burst the age bubble’ the guest list is generationally mixed.

With the same multigenerational goals in mind Youth Workers could invite members of the older generation to share their stories, young married couples could arrange an evening with an older married couple.

Having witnessed some of the most significant technological, social, spiritual and financial changes of the 20th Century, elderly saints must be given an opportunity ‘tell the next generation about [God’s] power and greatness.’ [x] Their faith and fortitude will undoubtedly inspire others.

Having said that elderly Christians must shake off any apathy rooted in a belief that their day is done. Because maybe, just maybe,

someone is waiting to hear your story.

Although some elderly saints might prefer to go gently into that long good night, the Spiritual Chuck Yeager’s [xi] of this world - although experiencing the pressure to conform to some people’s stereotypical view of old age – are determine to break-through the age barrier. Integral to the building of a multi-generational church these pioneering pensioners are simply looking for an opportunity to use their experience and expertise to further the purposes of God and cheer on the next generation.

PRAYER: May the God of all wisdom grant church leaders the spiritual wherewithal to build multigenerational communities that accept, approve and appreciate the elderly. May God’s grace enable those radical retirees the opportunity to seize the day, for knowing ‘that I am old … I must tell the next generation about your power and greatness.’ [xii]

[i] Baby Boomers – people born between 1946 - 1964 [ii] ‘Do not go gentle into that good night,’ – Poem by Welsh poet Dylan Thomas, published 1951 [iii] Psalm 71:9, MSG. [iv] Old Age in Ancient Rome, by Dr. Bill Thomas, www.changing Aging.org [v] ibid [vi] ibid [vii] Numbers 14:24 [viii]‘Breaking the Age Barrier’ by Mary Jacob’s, SilverCentury.org, May 3, 2019 [ix] ibid [x] Psalms 71:18-19 [xi] Chuck Yeager a United States Air Force officer who in 1947 became the first pilot in history to break the Sound Barrier. [xii] Psalms 71:18-19

The Generals are Going Home!

Billy Graham, Reinhard Bonnke, Warren Wiersbe, R.C. Sproul, David Pawson, Joel Edwards, Pastor James McConnell; Bishop Tony Miller; Dick Iverson, Luis Palau, Larry Crabb, Greg Haslam , David Yonggi Cho, Colin Urquhart – the roll of honor goes on. The list of Christian leaders leaving us continues to grow at a phenomenal rate, causing us to conclude that The Generals are Going Home!

While for us their departure is tragic, heaven’s gain is triumphant. For any accolades we might afford these spiritual giants is merely a preamble to the heavenly applause that awaits them.

Here are men and women who were colossuses in Western Christianity, titans of truth who invested their lives in restoring the church to what it is today. Prayer warriors who built gargantuan churches the likes of which we had never seen before. Kingdom innovators who rather than fearing a crisis flourished and pushed “the limits set by previous generations, for they [knew] that inflexibility leads to irrelevance.” [i] Leaders whose “framework of vision reached beyond the general consciousness to see God’s larger purpose,” people who moved the church beyond the narrow confines of the day. [ii]

Individually these pace setters spurred us on to break through self-imposed limitations, they inspired and equipped us to take back the territory lost to our own small-mindedness. Corporately they stretched our belief system to see beyond the barriers set by others. Marching to a different drum beat these generals of the faith forged an army of faithful followers causing Christianity to breakthrough enemy lines and establish the kingdom of God. They cut a swath through religiosity and manmade traditions so that much of what we enjoy today in terms of Worship; Faith; Out-reach; Kingdom Thinking; Servant Leadership and Church, is due to their spiritual endeavours.

Building on their foundations Christianity owes a debt of

gratitude to these generals of the faith.

There is a legacy that lives on. While Christian terms like Praise and Worship; Apostles and Prophets; Covenant Relationship; Spiritual Authority; Kingdom and Community, may now be part of our everyday language, these are phrases for which others have paid a price. Some suffered separation from the denominational main-stream while others laid everything on the line to preach and teach God’s progressive truth.

Lovers of the church, these leaders were obsessed with the purpose of God. Architects of God’s House they built sure foundations and fitly framed the church to create a habitation for God’s Holy Spirit. Having zero interest in fame or fortune, these were the spiritual MacArthurs and Montgomerys of the modern Christian era, people to whom we owe an incredible debt of gratitude. Yet while standing on the shoulders of these spiritual giants and gaining new spiritual vistas from the heights they attained, the question has to be:

• Who will rise up and become the next generation of spiritual generals?

• Who will lead the Christian church is such a way as to preserve the past and possess the future?

While some might be satisfied to be carried along in the wake of these Godly Generals, others will look for leaders who will build on their legacy and push forward to take new territory.

However, like the prophet Samuel checking out the sons of Jesse for the next king we cannot afford to become pre-programmed with old-school-thinking? When age, aptitude and appearance take preference over anointing, we run the risk of looking in the wrong places for future leaders. What if the next generation of generals are presently serving the purpose of God in relative obscurity - teenagers with a sense of calling faithfully working in menial jobs caring for a ‘few sheep in the wilderness.’[iii] What if those ‘who will serve the purpose of God in [their] generation,’ [iv]don’t rise through the ranks of our well-established methodology, but come in from outside?

At the age of 13 Joan of Arc believed she was on a mission for God. Louise Braille developed a language for the blind when fifteen years old. Bobby Fischer became the youngest chess player to be named a grandmaster at the age of fifteen. Malala Yousafzai survived an attempt on her life at the age of fifteen for speaking out against the Taliban and became the youngest recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize. The outspoken teenager Greta Thunberg, the Swedish activist, is challenging world leaders to change the way they think about climate change. So maybe it’s time for the church to look beyond the slick charismatic communicators and consider the possibility that the next generation of Christian generals might emerge from relative obscurity.

Just as John the Baptist, a leader of a different ilk, emerged from the wilderness to usher in the coming of Christ, maybe those pioneers who will set the scene for Christ’s return will be nothing like those who have gone before.

Standing on the hinge of history, those godly generals who brought us this far are going home. So maybe it’s time to acknowledge those young men and women of anointing, to bring on the next generation of generals who will by God’s grace rally the troops and take us places we have never been before.

[i] ‘Kingdom Innovation For A Brave New World, Doug Paul, 100 Movements Publishing, 2020 [ii] ‘Unto Full Stature’ – DeVern Fromke, Sure Foundations Publishers, 1985 [iii] 1 Samuel 17:28, NASB [iv] Acts 13:36